Now, I can promise you that we're not mad. In fact, we are very promising people, ambitious and filled with intellect. You should've seen the way that our plan proceeded; we were very respectable, very mindful, very demure. We did not burden others with our trouble. We did not harm anyone but who needed to be harmed. We were very, very demure. So, how then are we mad? It was never our fault, and if anything, it was those treacherous creatures. Let us take you through the tale of, as we like to call it, the Seagull Strangle, and you too, will understand what we mean.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't know when the thoughts of ruin infected our minds. But I remember it perfectly. It was the moment that we'd stepped out onto that gorgeous Waikiki beach. That water, a gorgeous turquoise color, was even brighter than my dear friend Tina's future. Just jokes of course! Live, laugh, love Tina. The salt was up in the summer breeze, the most nostalgic scent. It reminded me of the visit down at my aunt's beach house, running with my cousins into the ocean. The waves pulled me down and went up my nose, but still enjoyable, as the feeling of beaches calmed my brain. It made me feel like a different person, and for something to ruin that, is truly evil.

But, there was something else in the air that day. And, I mean this quite literally. Because wherever we went, we couldn't escape that swarm of seagulls soaring through those skies. Creatures that ruin the peacefulness and feeling of the beach. Seagulls are creatures found everywhere, and I tell you, there was nothing truly special about these ones. All of them were the same; stealing food and annoying us all. All of them except for one, the one who was a bit more devious than others. He had the most shrilling squawk, that drew almost real knives into my mind. He stole food straight from people's hands, and the joy in his eyes while doing so was incomparable. And his mindless shrieks, they were unbearable. And my dear friend and I, we knew we had to do something. 

So now, you can't call us crazy. We're just girls. We're just pretty, pink, princesses, trying to enjoy a pretty, little, beach. How mindful we were, how demure we were with our plan. Tina was never kinder to those monsters than the week before we set our date. She threw bread at them, sang songs, and even let them have a sip of her Starbucks. Now, before you say that, we were acting like they were our most skibidi best friends; they were not. We were learning, we were stalking, we were knowing. 

And soon, we knew all that we needed to know. The same seagull took his afternoon nap in a tree a few beaches over. His other friends must've thought he was strange sleeping by himself, so they left him alone during that time. And that was our perfect moment to strike. 

It was about 1:30,  and my skibidi friend, Tina, had just spotted the seagull snoozing away in his tree. And so we too, crept up into his haven. I listened closely, no squawks came out. A feeling of hatred arose in me, but I was not mad. Not mad, only curious, curious as to why the seagull would not continue squawking. My friend Tina and I watched the seagull as it slept. It slept silently. As time went on, my hatred got stronger. We sat in this uncomfortable branch, just inches away from our enemy, I needed it to squawk, I would not be satisfied if it did not squawk. We could not execute the plan unless this devious seagull would just SQUAWK. 

Finally, the seagull's eyes opened. His devilish, yellow eyes, locked with mine, and he let out, no, not just a squawk, he let out the largest SQUAWK. I was satisfied. And so, our plan was set into motion. 

I sprang up, I was not going to let this seagull get away! I let my hands up slowly, slowly, I was not gonna let him move. Then, when I was near his neck I squeezed it, as tight as I could. How dare the seagull make my friend and I suffer with this devil-like noise. These shrill screams, begging to be muted. And slowly, little by little, the squawks became silent. Peacefulness was attained.

 We were so exuberant after the deed had been done. And scooping sand into a pile, we buried the seagull to be gone forever. Smiles were due all around, to anyone who passed us by. But as the sun went down, and the moon rose once more, there was something in the air.

Squawk, squawk, squawk.

Tina and I shot up in our beds together. Eyes wide, and mouths agape. Squawk, squawk, squawk. But surely, surely he could not still be alive? He had been strangled, the deed had been done. 

A tapping gave a large fright, and as a large swarm of seagulls perched outside our window made eye contact with us, the fury behind their eyes was matched with silent beaks. 

And yet, the noise continued. Squawk, squawk, squawk. 

Screams of terror came from inside of us. And if in need of a confession, the seagulls certainly got one. 

"Stop it!" Tina screamed, and the same time I cried,

 "It was us!"

 And in unison, "It was us! Come take your revenge!"

SQUAWK, SQUAWK, SQUAWK.